I’m using a metaphor to explain a recent circumstance in my life, one that had me feeling disorientated and disjointed. It came as such a surprise, as everything I thought I knew, wasn’t, and what I didn’t know, was. This place of ‘not knowing’ is not comfortable and we always tend to react to something foreign in our lives with a variety of survival tactics in order to feel better. As I mentioned earlier, initially there’s confusion, then a sense of loss (loss of control, loss of a false sense of security and loss of all things past related to that particular circumstance). Some of us mourn that loss, some of us resist it vehemently trying to resume control, some of us lash out in anger, seeking scapegoats to blame and shame and some of us choose acceptance as a way forward.
Initially I brushed myself off and took what I chose to perceive as negative and directed all my energies in turning it into a positive by proactively and productively moving forward. It helped, but in truth, these newly cast paths were merely a distraction from the anger I felt deep within. It kept resurfacing. Every time I felt it, I would take a deep breath and redirect my thoughts elsewhere, busying myself with something constructive.
Then I met a wise and learned yogi who imparted a beautiful message that has helped me dispel all anger and allow everything to be exactly as it is. He said, “Have you ever seen a rose petal fall?” I answered by using a hand gesture that was graceful, as if my hand was dancing with the air before me.”
He smiled and said, “That is how we must fall”.
It made me reflect. In nature, there is no resistance nor criticism. The rose does not mind losing another petal. It does not think, ‘Soon they will all be gone’. Similarly the moon does not resent the stars because they shine brighter, just as the clouds do not resent the sun as they dissipate in its warm rays. Animals who move across thousands of miles to find food and water due to draught or natural disasters, they just migrate, there’s no anger there. They don’t blame the rain or lack of it. They don’t lash out at the sand during a sandstorm. They may sense the loss of a cub or pup or others within the herd, but the loss is overcome. In nature it is natural to overcome.
If you forget to water your plants over the next few days and they wilt and die, they will not blame you nor hold you accountable. They will simply wilt.
If a shard of broken glass left in a forest creates a focused beam of light that results in a fire, the trees, birds and beasts do not blame the shard of glass, nor the person who left it there.
Only we turn circumstances into drama, harboring anger and sadness for far too long by replaying the particulars of our tragedy over and over again, seeking constant solace or compensation of some kind. Seldom do we see the natural flow of everything and how effortless it can be, if we could simply be like the bee or the tree.
So when we fall, let us fall like rose petals.